Everything is a false flag designed to draw attention away from the REAL New World Order which controls everything.

Infowars doesn't like Beck. They call him an agent provocateur of the Illuminati/Federal Reserve.

Melo was originally slated to write for Luxury Newton's Cradle magazine, but he's too much of a ball stopper to ever get his to work.

The difficulty seems pretty punishing. Those enemies are real ball busters.

It looks like Lee is going in to execute the bane of elementary school kids everywhere: the purple nurple.

Boo. He could have been the edgy version of Boom Goes the Dynamite guy.

And today Philly's drive time sports talk radio shows will be inundated with calls asking for Right Paddle to be benched in favor of Nick Foles

Some AA pitcher? That's waaaay too steep for just Tulo. The Rockies better throw in CarGo as well if they want to get a megastar like Melky Mesa.

Both teams played hard.

"Those Arizona Cardinals got a brunch of Fruit Tarts."

Eh. Collectors will still want the cart. Chrono Trigger, Wild Guns, Harvest Moon, and Ogre Battle are all on the VC but they still command really high prices for the SNES versions.

That's definitely the Shane McMahon "cut the music" gesture.

Drew, please do one of these for an extremely weird show called Lazy Town. My only experience with this show was in a Vegas sports book where they forgot to change the channel after a basketball game was over. I need to know if it really is bizarre or I was extremely tired while watching it and made most of it up.

Spoilers: If you don't save immediately before turning off the game, Mr. Resetti shows up and gets you recalled as mayor. The game then turns into a taut political thriller VN about your quest for redemption.

More satisfying end to a guy rushing the field at a baseball game: getting tased by an out-of-shape security guard or getting speared by some jacked-up frat bro who's working at the stadium for the summer?

Can we get a top 10 headlines Bleacher Report ripped off from Deadspin?

I'm so proud of my alma mater for not being on here because it doesn't actually have a mascot right now. Go Team-that-used-to-be-the-Fighting-Sioux!

It's still real to me, dammit!

All the cultists who lived in Silent Hill liked killing a lot.

I plan to circumvent this by manually tweeting everything I do in every game.