Use it to store leftover Halloween candy. My parents have one and that's the only thing for which it's ever been used.

I'm ordering my European cheese hamper right now. I always used to throw my cheese on the floor and call it good. But Williams-Sonoma has shown me a better way!

Andrew Bogut already beat him to it:

Who takes their Terrible Towel on vacation with them to Disney World?

Every time Ferrell makes a comment about his time with the Hawks and playing in the NBA, I hope turns to T.I. and says "What you know about that? I know all about that."

Since Mike Brown was JUST fired, I now will say Dwight has gotten two coaches canned, even though Brown was probably a tag team effort with Kobe.

The current worthless big white guy poster boy has to be Darko. He can't do anything well. Or even tolerably. He doesn't try. He doesn't interact with teammates. At least Madsen had some energy and dance moves.

When asked what happened, Vince replied "Linda screwed Linda."

As a North Dakotan, I'll say we'd be fucking out of the battle royal almost immediately. We have no natural defenses and Montana or Minnesota would immediately invade us to obtain control of our large supply of nukes and oil. Our only chance would be to be annexed by Canada.

I love how huge the Taft basketball that TR is shooting is. It probably got stuck in the hoop.

You forgot Heidi Heitkamp (D) vs. Rick Berg (R) in the North Dakota Senate race. In North Dakota, it's virtually impossible to get elected to anything as a Democrat, but Heidi is in a dead heat thanks to Berg's being stunningly unlikable.

Jerry proceeded to fire the door and replace it with something much more malleable and easy to control: Wade Phillips.

+1

Because Texas Tech has decided they're going to manufacture a rivalry with Baylor by never showing RG3's games in Lubbock and saying he's not good enough to be shown there.

This described my gaming life pretty well. It's a vicious cycle.

They'll continue to strip titles from everyone who was juicing until the only rider left from any of those years will be a kid who rode his bike onto one of the stages. Then it will turn out the kid was using training wheels, so he'll be stripped of his title as well.

Speedrunning an Impressionist exhibit at MoMA? That's for noobs. Teh hardcorez run the Louvre. You've only become a true gallery speedrunner when you hack your way to the front of the line for the Mona Lisa by claiming you have 24 hours to live and have to see the painting now.

I don't care about the reviews. All I care about are hot tips to help me beat the game, like how to defeat the Cyberdemon.

The attorneys' retainer agreements included incentives for getting evidence deemed inadmissible (hereafter called "knockouts") and getting people thrown out of the courtroom for contempt (hereafter called "cart-offs").

It's also the only game I've ever seen which references Bleak House. It gets mad points for that alone.