Custer's Revenge is really a tale of forbidden love between an American military officer and a Native American woman. The arrows that show up as obstacles represent the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune and society's lack of acceptance of their relationship. It's a daring interpretation of Lady Chatterly's…

I'd do extremely poorly. I have no idea where to get typewriter ribbons, so I could never save.

Have you thought about combining Nazi Bill Simmons and the Gregg Easterbrook portion into one feature about Nazi Gregg Easterbrook? He's got the anti-Semitism and fervent belief that his ideals will save Germany, er, football, down already.

Sand worms? Skiffs that look like the ones Jabba the Hutt used? I expect some sort of Dune reference or an encounter with a Sarlacc pit-esque creature. Don't let me down, Gearbox.

I'm far more excited than I should be about the possibility of customizing touchdown celebrations. It's time to bring back the Ickey Shuffle.

Darren Rovell (born in 1978) is a sports business analyst who re-joined ESPN in June of 2012.

I was hoping the alt Thunder jerseys were going to be green and gold and say "Sonics" on them.

+1 destroyed autograph book

When I saw the picture for this, I thought it was going to be the resurrection of Fake Gamer of the Week. It's not, so I'll caption it on my own.

Amendola continued by vowing to produce Sandusky's day planner from the dates of the incidents and allege that nowhere in said planner is there an appointment that says "molest children," so he clearly didn't have time to do it.

When ESPN's ombudsman heard about this, he went as white as a sheet. It was like he'd just seen a ghost.

Verily, it was written in Gregg Easterbrook's notebook that Cardale was a Glory Boy. The Herald of the Football Gods has spoken. By my troth, I am off.

This is substantially less amusing than when fellow World Series hero Manny Ramirez sold his grill on eBay.

I'm eagerly expecting the PS3 version of this sometime in 2014.

I'd watch a sideline interview if it were done by Mean Gene Okerlund.

Some of them have competed in the silly annual event that is the Celebrity All-Star Game that is so inconsequential it goes on before the Futures Game or whatever it's called now. The Biebs was in it a couple years ago. As for the others, maybe they're buds with Jay-Z or something and he lobbied to put them in.

That celeb team is ridiculous on the whole. They could hang with the Dream Team or the Olympic Team. Pauly D shows no fear taking on Bird or Durant.

Hawk Harrelson concludes every White Sox loss with a performance of John Cage's 4'33".

SBNation has some great blogs and writers who actually know their stuff, as opposed to Bleacher Report, which is on the same level as a bad message board, with the added annoyance that you have to click "next" if you want to see the next terrible post.

Another great talent who couldn't stay healthy. As he's retiring, it's as good at time as any to make blanket statements about his career.