Who the fuck just stands on rocks, videotaping a fucking crab? The cameraperson was in on this, no fucking doubt.

Macário: [is punched into another dimension]

Hey, after Matt hit him, he did a pretty good job of hitting mat back.

Hey, what's the creepiest quote you could imagine from a man accused of rape?

Funny how so many teams are willing to give this guy a shot, considering how much he is hated by the Publix.

"How could you let that guy in the building?" - Assistant Manager, Red Lobster

"The second law of thermodynamics basically is the more ways something can happen, the more likely it is to happen."

Mostly odd because fights in Worcester normally see the guy named Khan being beat up by the pasty white guy.

*Yep. And with no waste in human or monetary terms, either.

Obviously, running a school was something else Deion couldn't tackle...

Worth repeating: "His biorhythms oscillating so high, they could deafen a bat."

I wouldn't mind.

Speak for yourself.

The leg bone's connected to the... face bone

The Burns meet a very soft penguin

KIA presents the heads up play of the game.

Apparently his "two fingertips and a thumb" technique translates beyond the gridiron.

I hope he wore a glove.

This girl seems like a pretty unbelievable catch.

Reminds me of when Dale Earnhardt drove into a wall in a NASCAR approved vehicle.