I just...I don’t know. Does she simply not understand the english language? Is that it? Does she just not comprehend what she’s saying? Or is she so tired that the words aren’t even registering in her brain, she’s simply reading shit aloud and not paying attention? I also heard her say today that over the years Donald…

*crosses fingers*

Pancake and Pie may agree to undertake this humanitarian mission if they will be guaranteed fresh feather toys and snacks

Breaking news: white man with lots of privilege cannot handle losing contest. Just wants things handed to him.

Dear Trump,

Any woman is a nasty woman to him. Except, of course, his daughter who is beautiful and stacked and he wants to molest.

Let’s be clear about something...

NEWS FLASH : 25% of women avoid sexual activity because they feel self conscious about their bodies WHETHER OR NOT they are overweight.

It’s like the worst ever elf on a shelf. (Who also happens to be another tiny, creepy, judgemental bastard. FUCK YOU EMILIO! I WAS A GOOD GIRL LAST YEAR AND I DESERVED THAT BLOW TORCH BUT CHRISTMAS MORNING COMES AROUND AND WHAT DON’T I GET? MY GODDAMNED BLOW TORCH HAVE YOU HAD CREME BRÛLÉE MADE UNDER A BROILER…

Excerpts from this interview are used in Hillary’s October 7th ad, one of my faves. Damn right women will be the reason you won’t be elected!

Hi my fellow Jezzies, I just wanted to take this moment to talk about something that has been bothering me in the comments. A lot of people here have speculated as to whether Trump has dementia due to his repugnant comments. My dad has dementia, he was diagnosed about four years ago. He never has, nor would he ever…

This certainly has been the October Suprise that keeps on giving.

Yes! Keep it coming. Let no one with a single shred of decency be able to defend him.

I hope.

There is a thing called an alkove which is basically a bed in a closet. They were common before central heating was a thing. Your body heat is enough to keep it warm.

Yeah, I mean why would anyone be afraid of being shot at. They should have just let the kid keep shooting because, after all, their training will magically keep bullets from piercing their bodies.

I stalked Ted to a men’s room door in NH to get an interview. And I got it. Teach you to take a piss in New England motherfucker.

He was twitchy, belligerent and badgering, and by the end of the evening nearly incoherent when asked about foreign policy (lack of stamina? Call Hannity?). She was calm and unflappable and so very prepared.

I didn’t see this right away and I called Dr. Hern’s office to ask how I could donate money directly to the practice. I had a fifteen-minute conversation with Dr. Hern himself. In addition to being a hero, he is a very humble and cool guy.