“Sepia Sense of Preciousness” sounds like a great book title documenting the history of the Cards. Very good.

Nah, this should be a one-time gimmick. And at any rate, Knick fans lack the requisite delusion of grandeur and sepia sense of preciousness.

The whole point of doing it with the Cardinals is because of the smug “winning the right way” mantra. I don’t know a single Knicks fan who would say that the team manages or conducts itself “the right away”.

You’re going to do this all year? Really??

Thank you for participating.

Padres are certainly good at putting their dongs in questionable places.

Well of course. Want the NFL’s attention? Wear brown socks with black shoes or something like that, and they’ll be up your ass within the hour.

“We think you’re shittier than Florida” is about the strongest burn I’ve ever heard of.

Are there any stats on how many of these murders happen because a meerkat wants to just relax a little with a beer after a hard day of working in the jungle and another meerkat won’t shut the fuck up about how badly the lawn needs mowing and it has to be done right away so it looks nice when that meerkat’s mother…

A lot of things associated with humans are often found throughout the animal kingdom. Adoption, homosexuality, farming, education, etc...about the only things humans do that’s special are religion and college debt.

Can we stop disparaging coke users by linking them to Donald Trump?

Gee...I wonder what could have been so distracting...

“Even as Mr. Trump’s advisers publicly backed him on Tuesday and praised his debate performance, they were privately awash in second-guessing about why he stopped attacking Mrs. Clinton on trade and character issues and instead grew erratic, impatient and subdued as the night went on.”

I would expect this kind of story if it was, like, a one-legged player who somehow managed his way through fire-breathing monsters and then nutmegged Ronaldo and THEN Bale.

Sure if you are an idiot and don’t realize Bartolo is immortal and will entertain us all well into his 70s pitching and hitting

As a Jets fan, I’ve suffered a great many indignities, from the Buttfumble, to Tebowmania, to Brett Favre’s penis.

I guess it’s a smart move to slip this in on a Friday afternoon, but man, why not just chop your balls off and mail them to the guy?