Thanks bro. Me too.

Awesome. +1. I'm glad you failed at suicide twice so you're around to make these jokes.

From: Briskey, Adrian

My money is on "Oh, FUCK."

I've played basketball (admittedly never all that well) for a long time. I'm not sure there's a harder shot than the step back 3.

If only getting out of Missouri were that easy for all its residents.

Did Chief Wiggum tape off the Jeep? That's quality work.

Not impressed

Having someone else "fire away" either of the first two times may have been the way to go from the beginning...

Without this jersey, there are no kids.

(...I think you might want to read past the first sentence.)

Definitely fake Bama fans, since real ones just upgraded to Windows 98, which isn't compatible with Twitter.

As noted by various people on Twitter, the back of the shirt reads "...at Texas."

This is the face of a man who knew exactly what he was doing.

Serious question: how can we get the NBA to implement a rule where coaches can pay $50,000 out of pocket for an additional timeout? Would coaches use this ability to buy timeouts frequently, even if there was no guarantee that an extra timeout would be beneficial? That's the NBA I want to watch.

I still have a scar from the last time my wife walked in on me 'starting a fight with the deputy'.

"It's only a matter of time before some clever students get Yao to join their pickup basketball team. Total domination."

Impotent until proven filthy.