Clearasily.

Once, as a teenager, I worked for a couple hours as a favor to my friend’s dad, handing out free samples of this really terrible energy bar at Costco. People will eat literally anything if it’s free and in a small accordion paper cup. This bar tasted like dirt rubbed in poo with some raisins in for a hellish texture…

I’m going to assume that I don’t agree with the Senator about very much, but at least she seems to be a responsible adult, unlike many of her colleagues.

C’mon now, that’s obviously a perfect 10!

I’d consider him a solid 9.5 in terms of punchability.

WHO IN THE FUCK IS SAYING THAT?

WON’T SOMEBODY THINK OF THE MEN WHO CAN’T GET LAID!

Please go to the police if you are ever raped and there’s literally DNA evidence to the rape strewn about where you wake up. I know the police get a bad rap, but the vast majority of them genuinely do want to help you. I completely understand fear, especially in this situation (if it’s true), but fearing the police…

penalty kick

TBH, it would require the entire Jez staff to keep on reporting all the athlete rape cases.

Have you not seen how EVERYBODY in the media licks the balls of whatever young male messiah comes along and thrills their hearts with something new and transgressive?

YEP. One of those just moved back into town last year after an ugly divorce. For months she pestered him with multiple versions of the following texts, I sh*t you not:

Sounds like your husband needs to get the fuck overit. Has he considered therapy?

He will never be in love with you? Does your actual husband tell you that? You (I know I don’t know you but this is true of nearly everyone) deserve better. I hope he has a therapist who is working on this with him.

If your husband has trust issues 13+ years after they broke up, that’s not Michelle’s problem. It’s his.

You are superior to all of them and you know it. Even the double trouble women. Own that shit.

Exes don’t bother me. It’s the ones that didn’t get a chance with him whom we both find a li’l ornery. He had a lot of girl (space) friends back in the day who clearly crushed on him and still do. It seems when one is in a firmly committed relationship, what might have been is a far more alluring story than what once…

nothing, exes are exes, if something still hunts you or your partner, you didn’t move on