"I knew Josh was hurting just as much as I was because Jerry was his brother. If being mad at Josh would bring Jerry back, then I'll be mad at Josh, because I want my son, but then what do you give to the rest of your family if you're bitter. So, I had no problem with him coming to be at the memorial service with us,…

"Fifty-three yards into the wind? F that"

Judge: Mr. Dershowitz, explain again why you had your junior associate strike Mr. Clement with a briefcase?

Wow, what an arrogant jerk....wait, he's not black. Wow, what a competator, caught up in the moment!

aren't biathletes banned from this year's games?

His first thought? "It was a feeling of 'Get back on defense.'"

I find it awesomely appropriate that the Jacksonville Jaguar logo looks exactly like Tom Ley.

Kids are also Wade-ing, where they remove all the cartilage from their knees, only show up to 50% of the school days, and stay in class after all the other kids have left to argue grades.

Millen: I’m telling you man…. receivers man… receivers.. they are going to start taking over the league man, I can see it…you can probably just draft a team of all receivers man… and you’d win… they’d be all like “throw me the ball man” and you’d throw them the ball because they’d be everywhere… totally…

"Oh man, what if football ... was no good... at me?"

Considering the possible ramifications of going to a movie in Colorado, the first person I'd invite is my shooting guard.

The use of public funds on sports stadiums and arenas is bad enough, but at least there's a concrete goal

Wow, he even borrowed Joe Amendola's legal crayon.

Is it any surprise that the BBW Association of America would hand down a heavy penalty?

I heard that he's also not allowed into BBWAA's official AOL chat room. They take shit like this very seriously.

After calling out Maddux for using "pitches that moved", Valentine leveled more accusations at Thomas, saying he frequently "jerked the bat forward in a violent swinging motion".

bbwaa@aol.com

That's odd - Hide the Midget was an annual tradition in my hometown, back in the day. Exactly one dwarf lived in the city. His name was Leeroy, and he ran a bakery. He could make some of the best bread you'd ever tasted, and he'd even give you some sweetrolls for free to take back to the kids. Swell guy. Anyway, on…