It could be worse, think of what happened to #3 after he smashed into a wall.

Spies? C'mon, Kurt, they're called spotters...

"So, who's that dweeb with the forehead?"

You might say it was a stairing contest.

The Bears just signed the cord to a 5 year contract worth 70 million dollars.

Well there's always the other NSFW. Not Safe For Wife

Kobe has promised to be a better person if the Lakers win 25 games.

What in the fuck is in the bottom of her tub?

"What are you gonna do tonight, Stef?"

Billy, I hate to nitpick, but I have a problem with the headline. The phrase "insane, masturbatory rampage" should be "insane masturbatory rampage." You shouldn't use a comma when the last adjective outranks its predecessor and is an integral part of the noun phrase. In this case, the rampage is not both insane…

this post contains every one of my least successful pickup lines.

*goes to private area to analyze court documents for possible clerical errors*

"Don't eat breakfast at Greg Schiano's house."

The fact that he considers mass-produced seasoning packets a "little known trick" is the cooking equivalent of his "little known coaching tactic" of screaming at people.

I was just talking to my agent about tracking that thing down and seeing if we could get it sent to the house and have some fun with it.

Fucking Hitchcock... that asshole is always trying to scare the shit out of people.

Quite a delayed reaction from Mason. On par for the course I suppose.

Report: Timberwolves unpopular with fans, according to telephone poll

That's okay, anonymous donor. Domesticated tickets are easier to deal with anyway.