Mike told Werner his wife would be terminated if she didn’t return to Germany immediately. He also told Werner that if she did go back, his death would be reported to the authorities as accidental, and she would be visited by German lawyers, I guess to either carry out the probate process or to fool her into believing…

The most telling moment of the series remains the moment when Jimmy reveals to Chuck that he is considering Elder Law as a career. Chuck was wrapped in his Faraday blanket, slumped in his couch, but as soon as Jimmy articulates a place in the legal world that is thoroughly beneath the Chucks of the world, he…

That’s a pretty major consequence, having to go through your entire professional career being reminded that you’re a domestic abuser, and that it makes you a bad person. I say, good on any fan that yells at that asshole.

Well the good news is he can still grow up to be president.

Kid burns are sick, man. One morning we were getting ready for the day, and my 4 year old daughter starts whimpering. As this is usually because she fell or ran into an open drawer or her brother smacked her with something, my wife says to her, “Is something hurting you?”

If you're happy and you know it, say a swear.

Really knows the playbook, has a great rapport with his coaches.

Doesn’t turn the ball over, makes good decisions.

The same leftists who want statues of Thomas Jefferson removed are now petitioning for Gritty to replace Mayor Frank Rizzo on a downtown mural.

I guess Flex-O-Lite ain’t gonna be calling him for an endorsement deal.

But they were right. He was being insincere. Chuck is the only reason he ever decided to become a lawyer, and considering Chuck’s status in the field, it’d be pretty hard to believe that wasn’t even a contributing factor to Jimmy becoming a lawyer.

The buffet could be nothing more than 90 different types of deep fried shoe leather, and Marshall’s Clearance Rack John Belushi would still stuff giant wads of it in his mouth and offer a nauseating thumbs up to all the haters and losers not inviting pancreatic cancer by frequenting Buffet Palace. Holy hell.

Except for the fact that Donald Trump is a wanton tax cheat and money launderer and there is a decent chance reasonable people think those are worth investigating, yeah exactly like all the Clinton “scandals.”

You can make anything expensive if you really want to, but even if you somehow manage to get 25 people to fly to Italy for a wedding, you can still probably just have the reception in a nice restaurant for a hundred bucks a head or less.

Destination weddings are a great way to transfer all of the costs of a wedding to one’s guests. Because they end up saving the couple a metric shit-ton of money due to the tiny size and typically modest ceremony/party, it’s only fair that they should offer to pay for the wedding party’s flights.

When I was a kid they had dark meat Chicken McNuggets. I’m 39 years old and I still fucking miss them. Come at me about it and my buddy will smash a beer glass in your ear.

How much does the head coach make? Why the fuck are they crowdfunding?

You don’t know the half of it. I GUARANTEE that WIP will field more than one call this week asking, in all sincerity, if they should bring back Jeff Garcia.

Sure, they’ve been injured. But they were injured last season and still won the Super Bowl. This year they’ve just looked bad.

Holy shit are NFL team Twitter accounts the absolute worst.