I’m starting to get the feeling that Shep only took the FOX News gig so he could derail their coverage with catty jokes, Vampire Diaries references and one surprisingly progressive opinion per year.

If Shep is hosting, it’ll be just True Blood recaps all night.

Oh is this about the Abramovich satanic cooking thing?

Right ladies, definitely marry one of the fine upstanding straight men whose life expectancy has dropped below 60 due to severe alcohol addiction. I’m sure they’re all free of diseases.

Yeah, nah.

Yeah, can we get a “Microsoft Flow For Dummies” explainer?

Daaamn, those abs!

Newt: *interrupts* “Let me point out something to you.”
Megyn: “Sure.” *cocks head* *icy stare*

I love my dog. My dog sleeps in my bed. I pull grass and hairs out of his butt every other day. I NEVER let him lick my face. He loves eating other dogs’ poop and he’s had colon parasites twice because of it. I even wash my hands right after he licks them, because’s filthy.

Felix Biedermann called Deadspin commenters stupid on one of his 3975 podcasts. Can you promote him please?

BRB gotta order one of those sex swings so I can try this game while I’m actually suspended in mid-air.

#3: No Woman, No Cry
IT’S NOT A SONG ABOUT VOLCEL, DAMMIT.

Hotel rooms are terrible and depressing though.

Sigh. Et tu, Bobbe?

I love Canadaland’s total commitment to pointing out how full of shit Trudeau and his fawning media coverage are.

I’m not surprised, she’s friends with Jim Norton and those Opie & Anthony creepers, and those guys either love Trump or heavily pander to Trump bros.

Being able to bring my dog to work. I work freelance right now, and my dog is the main reason I wouldn’t want to go back to being a full-time office employee. I turned down a couple pretty decent job offers because there’s no way I can leave him at home for 8 hours (plus 1-2 hours commute), even if I hired a…

If you have a dog, you could pour the leftover buttermilk into an icecube tray, dump a few treats in there and freeze it for a quick cooling treat after a long walk or run.