I can’t get over Taylor and Adele being around the same age anymore than I can’t get over GWB and Cheney only being a few years apart when they acted more like son and dad respectively.

taylor swift is almost 30 years old.

Full sincerity here; we’ll miss you and your writing here. I’m continually sad to see so many brilliant writers leaving this place, but I understand. It’s tough watching this place get slowly defanged and made increasingly mainstream and Voxian, but damn if you all aren’t magnificent at what you do.

holy. shit.

You also should not have a dog.

who the fuck goes after a no kill dog shelter?

Someone take this out of the greys, what a journey +1

“HELP!”

“It’s just hard to believe the dog was nasty when she took Lamby to every green room with her when Girls was still a thing 4 years ago.”

Holy shit! I just replied to your reply with an observation about Andrew Garfield’s shitty performance.

And their hours are “11-ish to 9-ish”. Oh boy. That means maybe open by noon if we’re hung over while reserving the right to close at seven for no discernible reason.

I was just in a bar and we made the bartender turn to the local news so we could watch this, then cheered when the story came on. There is literally no on in Memphis who’s not talking about this and it’s AMAZING.

Why do so many vegans have chubby kids?

I love how they’re like, “We are not a cookie cut, corporate business. In fact, we are the antithesis of this model” and then list all the ways your visit might be shit because of this.

This tweet reply in support of her meltdown totally clinched the stereotype.

It’s a very apt term, because it perfectly describes their thinking: 
“Hell yeah I’m overreacting!! To hell with the consequences!!”

I cannot stand, as in gets under my skin and crawls, when I see people on social media talking using Mama Bear. What do think will happen? Will the world cower and bend everything to suit the needs of their child because oh dear, the fear of that Mama Bear is so strong! Yuck. You’re right, I can only tolerate chill…

This is the drama that I’m here for and if the universe could please only offer drama of this caliber and not the horrifying real-shit variety it’s been into lately, then I would be a very satisfied customer of this experience called life. please and thank.

I don’t particularly like children, but part of what is so exhausting about interacting with them is the “DON’T WAKE THE MAMA BEAR!!!!” attitude of this type of parent. The best parents are chill, know their kids are wild hellions, and try to put some space between the kids and other people going about their days. The…

If I am eating at a restaurant and I see anyone’s butthole, I want an apology and a free dinner. Buttholes are a dealbreaker. And this is regardless of whether the butthole in question is a ten second butthole or a 15 minute butthole. Also, butthole is an intrinsically funny word, so kudos to Chelsea for using it…