don’t even curr. I think the “Hey, girl” stuff is hilarious.

omg fuck yeah Mike Tyson

Ted Cruz is truly incapable of a Duchenne smile. D:

My first thought was...this is a joke, right? This is, like, The Onion, right?

$83,000 to live “comfortably” in Washington DC?

I always think of DON’T YOU KNOW WHO YOU’RE DEALING WITH?

BUT CHICKS CAN HIT US FOR ALIMONY AND CHILD SUPPORT AND IN A DIVORCE, WE LOSE EVERYTHING, AND EVERYONE MAKES FUN OF WHITE MEN AND BLARG BLARG BLARG

As an owner of fake bolted on DDDs (sometimes DDs depending on the bra), I can assure you this would most certainly not work.

That’s like the difference between someone who goes out once in a while and has a few beers versus the guy who has to have a 12 pack and get shitfaced every night!

The main risk is getting drug tested by your doctor (if you’re an old busted up Gen-Xer who is paying for your adrenaline hits via surgeries now) or your employer.

And your solution is an extra few inches of skirt, and that will totes help the problem.

And sexual attention from teachers too! That’s what those whores deserve!

So you’re admitting that you think skimpy clothes are the reason that girls get harassed. Got it.

Except that changing the uniform doesn’t do dick to keep the girls from being harassed and you know it. Quit with the tired “If those girls would just do __________, bad things won’t happen” narrative, it’s bullshit.

“It’s 4:00AM here but it’s fine”

See, now, the way I look at it, someone who breaks into your house in the night is likely not there to say “happy birthday”. I guess my view is an uncommon one.

ARE YOU MY INTERNET WIZARD TWIN

I am one of those fake-boob-havers and I can tell you after having four kids, they look entirely natural, right down to the sag. D:

I so spit tea all over my screen on that one. BIG BREAST GODS

thank you for not putting that creamy disgusting green spread on a grilled cheese but leaving it as is, as it should be. bread, butter, cheese.