Google Cake.

I love Thighlights. This is all.

Hill Country Barbecue and Hill Country Chicken in the Flat Iron District have it. Last time I had Banana Pudding Blue Bell Ice Cream and life was perfect.

I lived in Houston as a child and have been to the Brenham factory tour.

*googles hot escargot soup* EEEEEek!

Are you in New York? I will tell you the secret place where you can get Blue Bell in New York.

But, but, why would you mention Blue Bell? I have gone entire weeks without missing it. *Remembers that one place in New York Serves it* But, I'll make it through.

Peach Ice Cream could be really good.

Isn't escargot the very best? It's like a chewy garlic butter delivery system!

Hot Cream of Wheat is like Napalm . It clings to you. Very effective for throwing in trebuchets over the moat.

This only seems like good sense to me. But it needs less Cream of Wheat.

I love a man in seersucker.

My impacted wisdom tooth got me a staph infection in my jaw, I had to be put on IV antibiotics and morphine. I assure you the pain of extraction is nothing compared to the pain of ignoring it.

I love Ted!

HA! That needs a Robot Chicken Sketch stat.

But, it's an all occasion website! Now you too can always access a sad trombone!

Is it possible you are my mother? That sounds just like something my brother would say.

I studied Pre-Columbian Anthro in School. I'm choosing to believe it was either the live embodiment of Quetzalcoatl or Chac Mool.

[sadtrombone.com]

—The Postal Service - Nothing Better