Whatever it takes for him to stop hitting women.

FUCK YES!! That beach is the the scene of some of my best childhood memories! Does it still have the tiny snack bar with the ice cream sandwiches that taste better there than anywhere else on earth?

god damn it! Does this mean I have to get rid of this?

Thanks for coming to Deadspin, Mr. Turgeon

Captials gonna Capital.

How can a venue be called “Rough Trade” and not be a leather bar?

Going forward I’m going to tell everyone to shut the fuck up because I have too low a smoke point.

Pro tip, everyone: Don’t fry in olive oil because it has too low a smoke point. Use peanut or canola oil to fry so you don’t stink up your apartment and set off the smoke detector.

“I am very good at cumming fast and in the presence of strangers.”

His friends could see that picture

Jo was better off with Professor Baer. She knew what she wanted and needed, and it wasn’t being Laurie’s idle rich wife, however much she loved discussing books and skating with Laurie. Amy was much more suited temperamentally to being a rich lady. Jo was a woman of action and needed the stimulus of being a writer and…

Does anyone else irrationally hate the word “hubby” to a disconcerting degree?

I was thinking it would involve a blowtorch, but this is way is probably more satisfying.

Bestie!

Warning!

I smoked weed the entire month of April so I got Miley covered.

...and the Yahoos have never felt more emboldened than they do now.

The people of this fucking city test my faith in humanity sometimes. This is a shameful day. One of many.

And that’s the other thing to it- it’s not a ‘back to 100%’ thing. You never fully heal from it, it’s more of a ‘good enough’ thing. My big one was in 1994 (!) and I still deal with migraines and vertigo (granted, I added a few spares over the years because I was an idiot and thought hockey > all else).

“Crosby Stilled, Gnashing of Teeth Ensues”