They created a power outage localized to Camden Yards to keep his streak alive, they would have figured something out. Bomb threat maybe, grease fire in one of the concession stands, biological agent...trust me, the game would have been cancelled.

He was transferred to hospital but first had to wait for an ambulance which was not present during the match despite numerous applications to local sports authorities in previous matches.

Your answer is informative, helpful, and non-judgmental. I hate it and I hate you, too.

Day says the good news is that Ellie is fine. But she can no longer enjoys listening to Dave Matthews Band.

Why does it have to be Baby Hitler, why not Art student Hitler? Its like a two-fer.

Whitest story I’ve ever heard

POSTER’S KID:”Santa doesn’t exist! He never came down my chimney!”

The Hawks retired Dikembe Mutombo’s number last night, and kicked off the festivities with this court projection.

Maybe there was a kiln explosion?

I promise it’s okay to enjoy this even if you like something else more.

Sir, just please calm down and we’ll get off your lawn.

How’d you guys figure out which one of you would be the straight man?

Holy shit I found something I hate even more than either of their comments.

Whenever some uppity Crossfitter gushes about how some steakhead idol of theirs totally crushed a 21 minute 5k at the “Games” I like to point out that their time would maybe be good enough to place at a middle school or JV cross country meet, full of lanky degenerates who hate training like those described in this…

Very discreetly put the cell phone back in your pocket.

i have 2 kids—-also, i wonder if Danny Glover wiped first before ending up in the bathtub??