I would watch 8000 music videos with Tom Hanks "singing" before I watch a Chet Haze video.

UPDATE: Apparently, Kean University then asked Bob Dylan to do the commencement speech, but then had to uninvite him because of his song, Hurricane

Dear Connor Family,

"So if I can just have your attention for about three hours..."

In case you need a little levity with this Indiana shit show:

Parole Tide.

"All the music you want at the touch of a button."

Mariah Carey has the worst taste in men.

Hey Heidi,

Right and look at that hair!

Imagine if any other medical procedure was treated like abortions? Oh you have an ear infection? Well we're going to have give you a colonoscopy, which is completely unnecessary and will also cost you money, but you know, Congress passed a law. Oh and also, ear infections can stunt your growth.

Don't do that! I'm 34, single, kidless, and I rent. My point is we exist. You just have to find us :-)

Wow. There aren't enough memes.

"which generates far more public outrage than killing humans"

Thank you for this. She seems so lovely, and I had only known her from Empire. She is a fantastic actress!

Good for you, my friend. I recently moved to Seattle and all I can say is, it is a pleasure to walk in to a store and have people super knowledgeable about their product. It sure beats going to the trailer park and getting whatever is handed to you...so I've heard.

I'd bet money that the man (or his wife or staff) irons his mom jeans.

It's a weed grinder:

"i come from the place where no pot is smoked."

"Sit down, have some Doritos, watch Broad City."