I’ve told this before but I don’t care!!!

I think that gun control would save a hell of a lot more lives.

Can you leave? Hide in a nearby hotel lobby or something?

Some bitchy woman in quebec slapped a man in the face with a tomato after he had clearly stated he was allergic. Pretty sure she got charged with assault with a deadly weapon.

“So, your table stopped me and asked what kind of fish they had was because they thought you were lying to them; I told them it was cod and they asked why we didn’t have real fish.”

Hahahahaha, oh Brayden, darling, did you read that delightful new Bruce Williams column in the daily print out of the internet that one of our several butlers brought us this morning?

“Have I personally insulted anyone?”

“just above the guy who dug a hole in a bag of butter and had his way with it before being caught in the act.”

They never took a doggie bag home and they never touched Golem Jesus’s meal.