I've seen her a few times too, one in which she spent the entire set SKEWERING Chicago politics (in Chicago) and she brought the fucking house down.

Cosigned

oh please. It's cheese on bread. of course it's fucking appetizing.

In Massachusetts, we spend a long time on our history too. But that's because we basically invented America. *flips hair*

Of COURSE Texas spends 3 years to learn state history. Most Texans think the state is so special and unique it needs 3 years to learn the history. But really, they're just too stupid to learn it in one year.

Yeah. We always had a 'Yay Missouri' week to convince us we weren't living in the worst state ever and waffle cones are something everyone loves, so they were a common focus. Like we made fake ones out of construction paper and had ice cream parties.

Best lines thread? Some of my faves are:

Becoming a mother does not change who you are. If she was a jerk before, chances are she is still a jerk now. Not impressed.

Cool! Now, all we need to do is have all the people with any authority at all in business actually get pregnant and give birth to with their very own babies since humanity proves over and over again that respect for others and empathy are nearly as fictional X-Men mutant powers.

Yep. I'm 36 and my youngest will be four next month. God willing, by the time I'm 51 they'll both be out of the house and I'll be able to go back to doing fun stuff. I can't imagine starting at that point.

Fuck you

you: "I want citations! Solid facts! Precision! What's with the shotty journalism?!"