And library computers! I would get sick a lot because of sick people use the computers without using the anti bacterial wipes that have been provided by the library! When I have to the use the computer while I am sick, I wipe down everything I touched while using the computer so other people don’t get my cold. Why…

Many years ago, I was sitting outside an aerobics room at the gym waiting for my class to start when I saw the grossest dude ever spit a giant loogie onto the back of a public drinking fountain. Onto the back part, so not even a part where he could try to wash it down the drain. It remains one of the more shocking…

“No it’s in dog years. His age only goes up every 7 years.” - An idiot named Ryan

I know that shame - the moment you figure out what you did was horrifically stupid and you would rather suffer forever than tell an adult what you did. I once touched the car lighter when it was hot because it looked pretty, all glowy and orange, and then had to sit through vacation bible school with a serious burn on…

I played Duck Hunt every night until I passed out.

YAS! I want to be BFF’s with Georgia and Karen. My BFF and I are trying to catch them at the Chicago Podcast Fest next month!

Hi fellow Murderino!

I still have them and am worried that one day I’ll be sprayed with pepper spray(or something), they’ll swell up, and I’ll die!

RESPECT THE THRONE!

The dads always get weird!

Seriously. She’s disagreeing with them while upholding and defending their right to express their opinion.

What she really should’ve been feeding her offspring is mice and small birds.

The Packers have neither a majority owner nor minority ones.

Plus his hands are too tiny

So, he’s sexually assaulted several people in public, with many witnesses present. How is this asshole not in jail?

When I was a kid I found KY jelly in my mom’s nightstand. I read the label, and one of its suggested uses was that it could be used for tampons. I convinced myself well into my late teens that that’s what she must have had it for... despite it being in a nightstand, and despite my mom not using tampons.

My wife has an extensive dildo collection. When we first started dating (early 20s) she would wash them in the kitchen and just keep them in the drying rack. I said “you know, why don’t you dry them in the tub behind the curtain or something”. She said “cause nobody visits my apartment but you”. Fast forward a few…

Well in the shower my feet are usually in a pool of urine, which I hear is sterile, so yes!

Mary, Mel and Sue but no Paul? Sign me up!

god so would I. look at the body on that thing!