I wanted to add parapets to the roof of my townhouse so I could put cannons up there for home defense, but my HOA said no...assholes.

So, I’d like to think that I’m the type of generally good person that would try to step in and stop something like if I saw it happening. My fantastical thoughts and reality often don’t align, though.

The clickbait-iest of clickbait titles.

There’s an open demo for everyone next weekend.

Sun is overrated. Fireplaces and warm baths don’t cause skin cancer (I assume, unless you’re really misusing them).

At least we know where FSU gets its inspiration for catchphrases

It’s almost as if Disney should’ve thought a little harder about handing one of the biggest IPs in existence over to a company that’s consistently been voted “Worst Company in America.”

As insanely good as the game was, I felt like the main story maybe dragged on a little too long. Especially when you consider how long the Epilogue is.

He totally stole that “stand-in-front-of-bored-looking-defender-and-meaninglessly-crossover-between-legs-400-times” move from Justin Bieber.

As an Atlanta native, I was 100% positive Luka was a HOF player the moment we traded him.

GO HAWKS

10/10 would ride

Oh yeah? Well your kids would’ve gotten home from school faster if they took Elon Musk’s genius Tesla-branded tunnel instead of some dumb bus that has to stop all the time....or something like that.

What you just did is the equivalent of walking up to a 1970s Arnold and in all seriousness asking, “Bro, do you even lift?”

Gotta be honest, based on the headline, I thought this article was gonna be about the MLS Cup making an appearance at the Clermont Lounge.

Counterpoint: fuck this article 

More home fans show up to ATL UTD games than Falcons games...

A few thoughts on the games that interest me, if you’ll indulge me:

Dear everyone,

The news headlines are admittedly being quite sensationalist with their claims of “BRUTAL BEATING” and such, but Hunt had ample opportunity to de-escalate the situation without resorting to any sort of retaliatory physical violence, and he didn’t do that. He was not defending himself. He was never in any true physical…