At first when Disney bought Star Wars I thought they'd ruin it, but then I realized they couldn't do much worse than Episodes I, II, and III.

Climate change is fake. I'm not a climatologist, nor do I even have a science degree, but I watch Fox News and they've assured me that I know better than the entire world scientific community on this subject. Actually, they're all lying. It's a mass conspiracy—to what end, I'm not sure—but it's surely a conspiracy…