Joke’s on you! She died of a heart attack!1!

This is my favorite Renton-related Almost Live comment:

If anything, the people of Renton are known for their nuanced but racist understanding of Washington State tax law.

She also asserted that her tax dollars somehow go towards Thorpe and Tyson’s salaries. That’s definitely not how taxes work, but believing so is definitely how being a wretched white person in America works.

Man, think of that, think how strong you would have to be to pick up the average green bay packers fan.

I’d rather have the flight delayed, and then canceled, and then the pilot quits, and then the airline goes out of business, and then the airport shuts down, and then all flights are grounded, and then humans lose the knowledge necessary for mechanical flight, than be on a barf plane.

This choice is easy without free drinks.

By the way, Barf was on the Space Winnebago, not a plane:

Yup, Ballard.

We celebrate courteously my good man!

This is the awning of the age of hilarious.

And in our desperation we turned to a city we didn’t fully understand.

My nephews, Easton and Weston, would like you to know it could get a shitload worse.

Is it farther to Minneapolis, or by bus?

how is superb owl formed?

Drew is going to have like six kids with names like Twig, Treg, Trapper and Spruce.

Why is the Super Bowl

Feb. 5, 2016, when I asked Barry if this concept was too stupid and he said “nah, blog it.”

Genius. I have new shitty neighbors across the street that love to park like assholes on either side of my driveway (and rev the shit out of their fart canned CRV and Civic at 2 AM). I had to leave a note one night because half of one of their cars was actually blocking my driveway and I had just enough room to…

To be fair, he only joined the crime ring very recently after it started doing well.