Homo longi burninatus

Tennish years ago, I bet a buddy that when McAfee checked out, it would be a virus that got him.

He really is one Rad Cliffe.

jesus christ you kids BREAK IN

No one in Mississippi has ever seen the Æ character before. 

“Chernobyl Wildfires” is a terrifying phrase...and a great garage band name.

Giant robots? Nice!

<Cheesy Russian accent>

Drake Mallard is my favorite Batman.

If there are no counterfeit five dollar bills with Abe Lincoln wearing a turtleneck sweater, I’m not really interested.

It would have the side effect of destroying the universe in an expanding bubble traveling at the speed of light, which is why she suggested not to do that.

What do you call it when the Lord of the Seven Towers, the Lord of the Lakes, the True Blade of Malkier, the Defender of the Wall of First Fires, and the Bearer of the Sword of the Thousand Lakes get together to play video games?

Nacho Fries just need to be permanent, please.

Yeah, chips and salsa sounds like complete bullshit.

Every time I grab an ubes (that’s what cool people call an uber ride: ubes (rhymes with pubes)) I hold an antique scrimshaw-handled straight razor to the drivers throat, a Mateba 6 unica to their head, a rusty old Slavic cavalry sabre to their back, and a cursed dagger that was hideously consecrated in the blood of…

“It is quite comical to see such a deadly and scary enemy reduced to a bumbling idiot. He keeps falling for the same trick, over and over.”

Can you imagine being the franchise owner seeing this much disrespect and waste in your store? I’d fire everyone on the spot, then I’d surreptitiously hire their family members just so I could fire THEM as well.

all I want to do is see Elizabeth Warren crush Bernie Sanders

Lots of coalitions in space have a north.

As an EVE player, I’m not sure I understand this. Are one of the coffees poisoned? Is it a distraction to steal the other persons car keys?