Job creation! Fire starters now hiring! And then we’ll need more firemen! And that’s FireMEN. NOT FirePEOPLE. Pft. Snowflakes.

all love to kesha.

I can’t imagine having to live life like she does. It’s like she’s always explaining the same painful thing to the same clueless people. It must be exhausting and incredibly difficult. Keep fighting the good fight Kesha.

They’re basically Captain Planet villains now.

I seem to remember God sent his Murder-Bears to rip apart a group of children for mocking a bald man.

It’s alternative energy! Baby steps!

They’re going back into the mines so it’s a distinct possibility.

With birthcontrol and Planned Parenthood out of the way, Orphan Oil will be a new, green source of energy.

The “Child En-light-enment” Act.

No, they have a much more Modest Proposal regarding them.

Their new Renewable Energy Initiative?

Yep, it is like Hollywood actresses complaining about wage gap between them and male actors. They are still having millions of dollars inside their pockets.

Guns in schools will take care of those pesky bears

A big thank you to 40+% of people who didnt bother to vote and another big sarcastic thank you to fucking assholes who keep voting these dipshits into office.

I like your style, June.

Every minute of every day... it’s getting worse.