Duke’s is the ONLY mayo.

Get all Archimedes on their ass!

I don’t understand why all the trucks are so damned big nowadays. Living in SC, it seems like every bubba has to have his monster, frequently lifted, truck. You see old trucks and even the heavy duty ones aren’t nearly so large. It must be a tiny penis overcompensation thing or something. They don’t need to be so big…

Searching Craigslist for a 2002 Mercury so I can be FLASHY too! I wonder if it has to be silver to be flashy?

They mean “fungo”

So, what kind of venereal disease can hubby bring home that messes up your kidneys?

Is that Roger Stone’s hair?

From Benny Hill’s classic routine:

Definitely COTD for all of kinja media!

Susan Smith, from my home town. Killed her kids, blamed a black man.

Where is the DelMonte? You need to try it!

When I was a kid, we beat the hell out of one on my road using hammers. Maybe it worked, since the road was repaved soon thereafter.

My wife swears that there used to be pad incinerators in rest area bathroom stalls. She said you would see smoke and scorch marks above them too.

Ran into this in Iceland. Tried to leave one of our cards in the slot so that our photography gear batteries could charge (it was a photography conference.) The housekeeper very kindly removed the card for us so that we wouldn’t waste any electricity.

^^^defuse^^^ NOT diffuse. FFS.

May I suggest proof-reading before hitting “publish”?

May I suggest proof-reading before hitting “publish”?

2-speed Powerglide, baby:

I have that one too. Does VA still sell real plates to anyone who will pay?

I have seen the workers at my local Ingles Grocery carrying full garbage bags (taken from bins outside the store) away in grocery carts. I raised hell about it and have seen it again since. YUCK.