Molten katana? More like aged squinting-to-blind samurai. That two-piece rear wing is kind of neat, however. Oh and a ‘miniature supercomputer’ – isn’t that old-people slang for any modern flagship smartphone? Come on, this is 2018, not the 1980s. Who are they trying to pitch these concepts to.

I don’t really feel comfortable in this world anymore.

At least his wipers won’t stick to the windshield. #silverlining

Can you DM my next game?

Gone In Sixty Two Seconds.

I never shower at the gym. I live 10 minutes away and am usually going right back home after my class.

Boy, you may want to get that graphite rod out of your ass, you’re gonna shit diamonds.

Man you must of either got beaten by a priest or woke up with a ruler up your ass.

What if you run off the end of the track out of control ... will you end up under the sofa?

Fixed

Trying to understand why a company that’s already circling the drain would spend $23 mil on something, anything, only to euthanize it.

Hey, it’s like capitalism.

Here you go

Like you said, you’re not American.

Hello. I’m not American. Can someone tell me why America thought it was a good idea to make a functionally illiterate man with severe personality disorders the President of the United States of America?

Full of juice...

A girl I know ran out of my building and a street sweeper ran over her foot and severed her pinky toe. Then after the ambulance left, I found the toe! So I put it in a Cracker Jack box, filled it with ice, and took off for the hospital.

I don’t see how it’s any different buying an iPhone vs a Samsung Galaxy 19, or a LG G56. Flagship devices are all expensive. To answer the other part of the question, yes it is difficult to get my iPhone friends to Whatsapp, or Tango. Which is why I’m switching back to Apple the 16th.