Yo, former US Navy submariner here. EVERY submarine goes to sea with mechanical problems. There is simply no way to have a machine that complicated, with so many different systems and so many millions of moving parts, operating at 100% capacity all the time.

“Historically, civilians bore few of the effects of war. In centuries gone by, wars were fought by hand-to-hand combat on battlefields located safely away from populated areas. In modern times, weapons have become more sophisticated and destructive, the character of warfare has become more complex, and more wars are…

+1 Westminster Best In Show award to you, good sir.

“How do I unpack the amount of emotional trauma this team has done to my wife and kids due to my rage from this team. My wife begged me to shut off the TV during the third quarter of the Championship because I was literally scaring the shit out of my kids because of the screaming/crying/rage.” 

Fuck this guy with Gary…

If you’re going to be a pretentious shit, at least spell “sommelier” correctly.

And I say this as someone who appreciates quieter bars.

Man, anyone who grew up in a place with “hotdish” and “duck duck grey duck” doesn’t get to talk shit about what people in Wisconsin say.

If you’re gonna rep Cleveland, why not support the kick-ass women of Burning River Roller Derby?

It’s true; stupid babies really DO need the most attention.

Holy shit, he killed Joe Flacco?

*reaches for checkbook*

It’s gonna be great when he sacks Roethlisberger approximately 12,941 times during the AFC Championship game.

Yeah, which he got by essentially being the Aaron Rodgers of garbage time.

“He’d starve your grandma, he would!”

Behold the NFL referee for the 2018 season:

It’s always good to see when true scumbags get to die in jail.

I grew up mostly in Mississippi and got the fuck out via the US military as quickly as I could. Fuck the entire southeastern US. Reanimate the corpse of William T. Sherman, give him a cargo ship full of napalm, and tell him to get to work again.

Anyone who disagrees with you is an anti-Semite? That’s....an interesting way to approach the world.

No, it’s not a mystery how things withstand the pressure at ocean depths; they’re bags of fluids and the pressure is equal on inside and out. The same way we withstand the pressure of the atmosphere above us. This shit isn’t hard.

Approves:

Just waiting for the dipshits to come in and say LeBron is racist for going in whiteface. You know that train’s never late.