What?

At least Durant contributed to his super team’s championship. All I’m saying is he easily could have helmed the super bowl 50 Broncos and won by a wider margin, if only by virtue that Durant can feel his fingers and tie his own shoes.

Fact is, he had all this shit in his car, so comparing it to people who have it locked up in their homes is a false equivalency. Also, I still doubt your ‘millions.’

Yeah, he could only take out a couple classrooms full of children and a few cops at the most with that. Just another day in ‘merica.

Considering that you lost you son, Andy Jr., to gun violence, I’d think you’d be a little less phlegmatic about this cache of weapons.

Breaking: Blazer Bust Busted By Brooklyn Blue, Blazed

The Nats are just incredible this year. I know we’ve seen this before, and I know they have let their fans down before, but this is it, man. It’s gonna happen. This is the year the Nats are gonna make it all the way to the NLCS.

We debated this one for a while trying to parse out Scherzer’s exact string of words, though some of them are pretty obvious. I think we’ve settled on “fucking bastard motherfucking bitch motherfucker” and now I can’t see it any other way.

Maybe a gun. Or maybe not. Looked like one to me...but I’ve seen enough videos to know that it’s very easy to be fooled by a video.

“Uh, preferably not like Brandon Knight?”

“Old, Rich and covered in lube.” -Me

“I reference a past case, ‘The People vs. Common Fucking Sense’ in this matter, Your Honor.”

As a fake internet attorney, let me preemptively address the knotty legal arguments from those who would ask “What about his right to free speech?”: Shut the fuck up you fucking idiot

It’s hard to criticize the ACA when so many people want to take it away, but it really is a deeply imperfect thing. It’s amazing how people seem to think it’s a product of Obama’s “super-liberal” (he was a moderate) agenda, but it’s just a national version of Romneycare—which was the Republican plan for healthcare.…

“’10% of NFL teams”? Why not just say ‘a handful’?”

You can’t unplug my ventilator I never bought an iPhone!

rather than getting that new iPhone that they just love and they want to go spend hundreds of dollars on, maybe they should invest it in their own healthcare.

“And even if some good ones die, fuck it, the Lord will sort em”

Totally. You’re the worst.