Ooh, this one will be fun! The first story coming to my mind is one I have told on here before, but I’m sure it will be new to most of you:

No, it’s Becky.

GET IN LOSER, WE’RE GOING SHOPPING

This is inzayn.

I mean, she should at least milk the cow, right?

It takes years to master, and though it does have its rewards, the reward I seek is not a hot dog. Moose does tricks; I memorize lines, say words, even walk around and stuff. But I don't need a trainer standing off-camera, gesticulating wildly and waving around a piece of meat, to know where I'm supposed to look.

Hi, I just had post this reply so you could see it in your notifications. It appears some asshole has hacked into your Kinja account and is posting stupid and unnecessary contrarian posts with unnecessary semantics arguments.

HI HELLO WHAT THE FUCK ARE THOSE AND WHERE DO I GET THEM

are you a cat

irrelevant to the conversation at hand, but you're trying and that's endearing.

Everybody is reporting this incorrectly. While it may be spoken as "James" it is spelled Yjaiymeise which is a collection of perfectly curated letters that are hand harvested from 100% biodynamic veganic fair trade locally sourced alphabets.

Oh my god, seriously. Just because she also hates Iggy Azalea doesn't mean she's awesome. The enemy of my enemy is sometimes still just a huge fucking douchebag.

"As a palate cleanser for the last two weeks, please enjoy some stories of terrible customers receiving their just rewards."

My guess would be because she's terrible.

So, you're saying that he doesn't look exzachly the same?

Eggsecutives.

tbf you do hate free speech

Today, I attended a funeral for one of my dearest friends. I was walking to my car that was parked across the street in the church parking lot. Im wearing all black suit on a 75° day, a black church lady hat, sunglasses, and carrying the funeral program in clear view. As I stood on the corner waiting for the light to…

I am nothing if not my ego and a whole lot of fake blood.

We all work here and are joking around with each other.