My girlfriend and I decided that this year when I go on motorcycle rides alone I’ll be turning on Glympse or some other form of tracking. That way if I’m not home when I say I’ll be she can look and see where I am. If the little dot is moving, she’ll know I found a different fun road. If it’s not moving and it’s in a…

If I take out my phone during silence and my girlfriend wants to talk, I’ll put the phone down and do my best not to look inconvenienced. I’ve found though that if she’s acting like an asshole to me, I can take my phone out and escape into social media. Usually by the time I’m done making some pointless comment on a…

The screenshot of a phone that says “hit this button in the next 15 seconds or we’ll notify your contacts” bugs the hell out of me. I routinely miss text messages for an hour or so. You better believe I would not hit any of these reminders.

“And I do hope they get help because this is gonna be exacerbated by 1000 if they ever have children.”

Besides, there’s no prize for being neurosis-free

Yes, if only there had been a woman reporter over a hundred years ago. Perhaps someone who famously went undercover in a mental hospital or travelled around the world. Or did something notable like that.

Saying “Everything works out in the end” to Craig Sager was kinda cruel though.

Played in Philly, or had 100K on Nova?

Bryce Harper: Future Yankee

I honestly can’t speak off the top of my head to the procedures of foreign countries (give me a few hours, and I can get back to you with a more thorough answer), but whenever President Obama flies somewhere he brings his own limo with him. They ship it in an Air Force cargo jet.

I’m pretty sure the King of Jordan actually is Royalty. Like, by definition.

I’m sure they ferry them around in cargo aircraft just like the US does.

She does have a very large penis. I believe it goes by the name “Wilmer”

Yup, there’s always some excuse so we can’t point out how shitty men are to women. Oh, but he is such a great sports player! Oh, but he writes so well! Oh, he is too young/old to know better!

Oh, wow.

I think I’m doing ok! But thanks!

He's so irrelevant he was asked to speak at an industry event. Nice argument there

No

2 d’s in 1 b-hole

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