Flying back from Ireland, I was “randomly selected” to have an extra chemical swab done on my bags and feet. After apologizing for the atrocious stench coming from my feet (5 am shuttle to the airport, Goddamn Latvians closing the windows in the 18-person room at the hostel, and a late night drinking with new friends…

I still call them that, but I always thought endo = pedal bike, stoppie = SQUIDmobile

Now why would you go and do a damn fool thing like that?

It hurts a lot more when you go ass-over-tea-kettle with 2-300 pounds of bike versus 25-35.

This is my favorite way to stop in public on my mountain bike. Sans ridiculous apparatus, that is...

Gypsies, huh? Did they throw in a dag?

From Where Eagles Dare to Bitchin’ Camaro... I see a trend

Reading that title made me think I was having a fucking stroke.

I think they’re implying it rules Oklahoma.

Day 47: The landies are beginning to suspect that I am not one of them. Note to self: less offroading, more pretentiousness.

Between that bullshit and the coke jokes, it’s a hard fanboyism to have.

I think I read that somewhere (Cracked delves into this type of stuff all the time.) I’m a big believer that Ferris Bueller is a figment of Cameron’s imagination, too.

Doge, why did it take me until now to realize that you lived in/around Philly? How do I get to drive your cars?

Mid-afternoon on a Friday is the best time for #torchlopnik to start.

Literally off of the Kraken bottle, for those keeping score at home.

Twingo cannot into Espace ;_;

If you think the SZ is ugly, you’re probably on the wrong website.....

It gets me EVERY TIME

Why does the richest motherfucker in the world need to steal forty goddamn cakes?