Already been said, but hey, dummy: mandatory minimums and the federal sentencing guidelines are completely separate things. The guidelines are for verdicts that are not covered by separate statutes that impose mandatory minimums. That’s why they are called “guidelines.”

“I swear to God I will pistol whip the next guy who says ‘shenanigans!’”

“Hey Farva, what’s the name of that place you love with the mozzarella sticks and all the goofy shit on the walls?”

RNH is a good player! But... not good enough (yet) to fetch a perennial Norris contender.

Well, we’re talking DoPS, so it could be anywhere from 0 to 10 games. I’d imagine they’re throwing darts at their “How many games?” decision-making dartboard as we speak.

Oh, it was St. Laurent? Nothing to see here, move along.

+1 Reagan speech about “slipping the surly bonds of Earth”

Not a chance. Try Taylor Hall plus some picks.

Trollololololololololololol

Deadspin is usually wrong, but they’re right in this case. Fuck Simmons and fuck everything about Grantland other than Barnwell and Lowe.

Oh snap!

STICK 2 SPROTS AMIRITE

I don’t know but if you ask me it’s all OBUMMER’S fault amirite

the Rooneys, the Maras,

Oh man, a “____ called” joke. Watch out for the king of comedy over here!

Aw, c’mon, Barry. Snore.

That’s what fans really want to read about: not something interesting that happened on the ice last night, but about retiring some fatso’s number. Good taek.

This is a dumb idea and you should feel bad.

So tired of thugs like Newton ruining football, while good ol’ boys like Johnny just need the right situation to help them mature a little bit.

Strong taek god bless

HOW DARE YOU! THE VIAGRA JOKE IN THIS VIDEO WAS SO FRESH