I thought the stock market was doing well because it has nothing to to with the real U.S. economy, and is actually a global conspiracy construct created for and run by reptilian overlord illuminati-types who line juice boxes with chemicals to make everyone gay it up. C’mon, Sheeple!

He’s so confusing. He hates civil forfeiture and high bails, but calls the Russian investigation a witch hunt. I just think he is a rare true believer in a game full of people that have no beliefs. Is he stupid? Absolutely. Is he consistent? Surprisingly so. He’s my senator and I hate him, but his bizarre belief…

It allows her to pass a criminal justice reform bill that helps people. Even if it doesn’t help her become president (and I personally prefer Elizabeth Warren) it helps people and that’s important.

And when is someone going to tell him that putting a word like sick in quotes is actually implying the opposite meaning, not emphasizing it.

“8 Dems control Senate. Crazy!”

We were let down by all of the Democrats and a few Republicans.

Speaking of Trump, Jr., this fellow sure seems to enjoy visiting Moscow.

[Sergeant] Detritus was particularly good when it came to asking questions. He had three basic ones. They were the direct (“Did you do it?”), the persistent (“Are you sure it wasn’t you that done it?”), and the subtle (“It was you what done it, wasn’t it?”). Although they were not the most cunning questions ever…

yapppp and this sums up everything perfectly.

A couple of the tweet-sized notes have leaked and they’re generally filled with pretty good advice:

Putin will bring menstruating women with him into a meeting to scare Trump.

This is an excellent grammar lesson.

Grimey eh?

I don’t know, but this passage from his Wikipedia page is fairly amusing.

Kobach has already responded to Kobach, saying that KS will not be sending the SS #s, at minimum. Kobach is really going to have some harsh words for himself next week.

Tommy Callahan? Big Tom Callahan’s son?

So, previously, Trump was saying all this Russia business was “fake news” and never happened.

If there’s any consolation in this its that it’s the least effective witness intimidation tactic EVER!

“You’d better hope there isn’t any tape of our conversation!”
“The conversation between us that completely supports my account of events?”
“Exactly. Check and mate...”

Cruz wants to pass this bill but it hasn’t insulted his family enough yet.

If I’m understanding Ricky correctly, we just have to get all of the waters out of our oceans and we’ll be good to go.