“Welkeresque Ratboy” is my new thrash metal band name.

In this case, it’s not. Because they know what Manafort is going to say, and if they assert right off the bat that he’s going to tell the truth AND that the President did nothing wrong, well... they know those statements are contradictory. :)

“Your Honest, that flag is an admirable flag, which means you’re a fake judge. SAD!”

Hey, why not Lin-Manuel Miranda? I think we should put a producer in the White House who can run America like a successful Broadway show, instead of like a crappy reality series.

What was it John Mulaney said? “Just because you’re accurate doesn’t make you any more interesting”? I think that applies here. :)

In fairness, that’s all they ever did.

Amen. The only thing encouraging about these shitty Hawt Takes by assholes is how utterly unwelcome they seem to be with audiences who have lost fucking patience for the #NotAllMenButYesSpecificallyTheseMenButTheTimeForForgivenessIsNowForDotDotDotReasons movement before it even started.

I am honestly stunned he had the presence of mind to avoid a racial slur.

It’s a quote from ‘The Good Place’, when Michael (the immortal being who runs the neighborhood) is first trying to get his head around the idea of death and gets a little loopy.

“Okay, I know what you’re thinking. Birth is a curse, and existence is a prison. But don’t think about that. Don’t be sad, you guys. Focus on something great like Drakkar Noir which I am wearing a lot of tonight. Or the Sharper Image Catalog. What can’t those guys ionize? By the way, I am feeling amazing. I’m going to…

Yes, we all are. But there are people who use that as a motivation to do better, and people who use it as an excuse to be worse.

It’s not just the White House. Democrats are pointing out that Kavanagh blatantly lied to the Senate multiple times under oath, and they’re basically just, “Yeah, but he’s a made man. You can’t touch him.”

My honest feeling: If your jokes are indistinguishable from the shit that conservatives say in complete and total sincerity every single day online, then they’re not really jokes. They’re just sort of lies that you thought would be funny because they were so obviously untrue to you.

Do you need to lick the hot stove before you decide to turn it off?

Relevant:

You know that the “slippery slope” is a logical fallacy, right? It’s an error in reasoning whereby an absurd conclusion is justified using the premise that people will always continue to pursue a goal to its extremes without considering the consequences even though people don’t really operate that way. It’s like…

“I don’t think being an asshole is inherently funny.”

The thing is, though, it is perfectly consistent to both a) want more minority actors cast in traditionally “white” roles, and to b) not want white actors cast in traditionally minority roles, because in both cases the issue is the same—there isn’t enough representation for women and minorities in Hollywood.

Funny, this actually reminds me of a quote from ‘The Good Place’, where one of the demons said, “I took the form of a 45-year-old white man for a reason. I can only fail up.” 

So...imagine that we both have a pile of cookies. I have, oh, let’s say two cookies. You have a stack of two hundred billion cookies, enough to literally stretch to the moon and back. More cookies than you could possibly eat in a single lifetime, especially because eating that many cookies would just straight up kill…