I wish they would give you an advice column.

Come on - the real question is: How much should I tip for the water my dog drank?

Dear Salty Waitress,
How much should I tip the garbage collection folks - is it $1 per can?
Thanks.

I think you are ignoring the TSA’s 95% failure rate.

Eh... “regular coffee” means with cream and sugar.

My name is Kinja, comment section of comment sections:
Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!

And what rough beast, its hour come round at last,
Slouches towards Bethlehem to be born?

Wait, you can upvote yourself?

Aren't humans already animals?

Let me see the Tootsee Roll!

Gawker? I think you've set your expectations a little high.

The AV Club tends to up the righteous indignation and dumb down the content when they repost.

"Working with" means it's not even on the roadmap.

Eclipse - check.
Corpse flower in bloom - check.
Switching to Kinja - check.
All the signs of the apocalypse are there

cue the sad hulk walking away music.

I miss What If.

What are you talking about?
They celebrated by making Captain America a nazi.

I went to the ventriloquist dummy museum in Kentucky.
It was super creepy.

She was bitten by a Duchess - so she only turns into a Duchess when there is a full moon.

Let me know when Lady Convenience Wife visits Dr. Pleasure