There’s still time for a Harry Potter spinoff where Sheeran plays a heretofore unknown Weasley child whose job at the Ministry of Magic is to go around to the wizarding schools to make sure everyone’s using the correct bathroom for their gender at birth.

If you have children you’ll know to just buy easily lost items like socks, covid masks, hoodies, gloves, etc. in bulk and have stashes all over the place. 

I would love to add insult to injury by informing him I do all of the above and still get laid. Maybe it’s because I’m not a huge asshole?

You would be pretty ornery if you walked in on Lyman elbow deep in Jon when all you wanted was some LASAGNA!!!

As a late 80's early 90's teen all I had was...

It’s probably not the most economical way to add rice to my soup but, as someone who eats a lot of meals solo, it is the most convenient.

Even better at getting divorced, apparently.

Ariel Pink’s “Fright Night” always sets the mood.

In the Denver metro area they won’t even send out a cop if your stolen car isn’t worth more than a certain amount. 

And, unfortunately, they have another powerful person to give them permission to choose hate and dehumanize other people.

They will use the key grip’s statement as proof she was incompetent and he in fact is responsible for not doing more to get her kicked off the set.

Twenty years ago I’d say he was on that trajectory. There was no other black comedian at that time who crossed over like he did while not having to pander to a white audience. I feel like if he didn’t fall off the face of the Earth we’d be talking about him like we do Pryor or Carlin. Chapelle took a bunch of years…

Cops totally get off on this, are you kidding me?

They should move the cars and coffee to Jay Leno’s chin.

Tell me your dad was an emotionally distant person who only gave you attention when he was yelling at you for just existing without telling me...

It wouldn’t surprise me if they’re currently putting their business and assets into other people’s names. 

They want to give the family time to hide their assets.

Yes, a civil case against the kid and his family. The cyclists’ lawyers posted something a while back stating they definitely have a good idea of what the family is worth - i.e. they are going after everything.

Ok great. Maybe she should be the gov. of Arizona instead of being in a position where she can screw over people in 49 other states instead of just her own.

I’m sure he’s joking now, but you know he’s kind of taking it seriously.