For every douche here who is complaining that this is pointless, who cares, and so on: This site really needs to happen, and it will fail because Whitlock is an bloviating egomaniac who can’t see the big picture. And when it does, there won’t be another chance for a good long time, and so it matters that Whitlock is…

If anybody would be prepared for KD leaving after 1 year, it’s him.

This guy or gal is definitely a law student lol. Anywho, why are we assuming the issue is causation? The Bucs hire doctors, their doctors treat players. In many cases, players are required to use team doctors. The allegation is that the Bucs doctors recognized a condition that they knew or should have known to be…

This is an insane thing to think and type, and you should feel bad for having done so.

We are all Wisconsin.

My vaguely related pencil story: I'm in third grade getting ready for one of those super important standardized tests that go on your permanent record. I have two #2 pencils sharpened to super pointy points, each with one of those erasers that you stick on the end. Seconds before the test is about to start I…

It's Indiana, not Insteve.

Next week on "Behind Closed Ovens," The story of some guy who ordered a Reuben with Ranch Dressing on it.

Seriously. I'm stuck at work at can't listen to an hour long podcast. Write it down ya lazy fucks. Also, you have a girly voice.

I'm sorry, shouldn't complain about free content, etc., but I'm pretty disappointed that this is a podcast. It'll take a lot longer to listen to than to read, I might miss some of it if I accidentally concentrate on work and stop listening, and, most importantly for Deadspin, it's what Bill Simmons would do.

You trying to get the Power T?

By the time they enroll, most UNC and Duke students know how to spell and use proper grammar.

I wasn't popular in high school. This was long before the days I could walk up to a random chick and say, "You're with me, leather." I was just Chris Berman, painfully shy 17-year-old virgin. Well, as luck would have it, a girl transferred into our school mid-semester. I could tell she was desperate to be liked. And…

A better idea than Penn State's touching tribute for Joe Paterno.

It is absolutely PR. But in spite of itself, I have to say, this whole scandal is starting to endear itself to me.

This story involves a shit I actually witnessed, versus one I took.

My wife was 39 weeks pregnant meaning she could deliver a baby any day. We were out and had some time to kill before my wife's weekly OB appointment, and as my 2 year old daughter was behaving fairly well, I decided to take us out to a nice place for lunch, rather than the normal soup/sandwich/ Panera type of place…

It's the total opposite, and not that dramatic, but I'll always have this terrible memory of a girl I had a crush on in high school asking me if I wanted to go to see the Mystery Science Theater 3000 movie with her when it came out in theaters. For some anxiety-ridden ungodly reason I said I had plans or some dumb…

Let's just say it wasn't a year. It wasn't 6 months. It wasn't a month. It was stupid as shit on my part. I was making decent money at the time and I had never met someone like her before so it was the perfect storm of making stupid decisions. Let's just say I learned my lesson, and actually cut the ties when she…

Signed, Roman Polanski.