Because he has no dick.

Absolutely not, just copious amounts of alcohol. We were v. safety conscious.

I am beginning to understand how this kind of political hate comes about. He is the absolute fucking worst. A fucking liar. A fucking idiot. A fucking lying idiot. Just a fucking fuck! I am starting to feel the flame of a “burning hatred” beginning to develop and I don’t like it at all.

His book will do very “successfully” with or without you, okay?!

I fucking hate this man.

I plan on tricking him into giving it to us.

Anybody else finding themselves sighing frequently, not enjoying things, like ice cream, as much, constantly feeling on the verge of unexpected violent tears? Anyone else get queasy when they turn on the news, cynical when they open their Facebook and wary when strangers start talking in a doctor’s waiting room that…

Minors, even Italian ones, should be in school and not posting on Kinja!

Who knows, maybe her name really is pronounced “Gwees-tin-a”

We’re probably in the Upside Down.

This is actually season 7 of American Horror Story we just don’t know the exact theme yet.

Goddamn that response from Ashly (<--wtf?) is chock full of red flags.

This type of situation is impossible to have as an adult. Were I to somehow find myself on the receiving end of that initial email I would have responded with a Channing tatum-esque wall of hahahahahahah

I’m totally chill as long as everything goes my way and nobody disagrees with me in any way. If you do disagree with me, then you are obviously trying to start WWIII and whatever comes after is your fault. Just give me everything I want and never, ever backtalk and we will get along great.

I’m totally like real chill but I WILL FUCKING CUT YOU IF YOU USE MY DESK LAMP SO DON’T EVEN but I think this is gonna be such a fun semester u guyz, looking forward to meeting you!

i am living for this

Am I the only one terrified for Winnie when Ashly finds out this has gone viral??

We are all in my long psychotic episode. Sorry! On the plus side, you're just one of my hallucinations, so you can rest easy.