I can’t be alive. This makes no sense. Am I on a tv show or in a coma? I’m in a coma aren’t I?

We are gonna build a wall, and make the Picts pay for it!

+I

And for his next trick, Trump will appoint his prized racehorse Incitatus to the Senate.

Anthony Rizzo of the Chicago Cubs is 6-foot-3, 240 pounds. Pretty much the same physique as Trump, right?

It’s Kaleigh McEnany that gives me rage-strokes.

One of the good ones, of course.

I’m just... baffled that despite Trump’s lies, his obvious lack of transparency, his flat out scandals, he has somehow cut down Clinton’s lead to a mere 3 points.

How have we gotten here, America? How in the f*** can Clinton get criticized and eviscerated for these exact same qualities, and yet somehow, Trump can just…

What the fuck is in these records that must never be shared? I’m almost more interested in this than his tax returns.

Does he know that Oz is a Muslim and son of immigrant Turks?

Two quack con men jerking each other off. Should make for great tv for the trumpie crowd.

I have the opposite problem with my jaw - I’m constantly grinding my teeth.

The Airing of Grievances will probably be necessary in multiple rounds.

The last 15 months should make it clear that the grievances have come first.

Not to mention someone needs to explain the difference between maternity leave and family leave to the Trumps. One promotes gender bias in hiring and promotions, the other doesn’t.

Baby on the left is reaching for help.

CNN did a ten minute “investigative” reporting but about the whereabouts of Melania this past week. Basically, she’s at home riding it out like the rest of us.

• Guarantee up to 12 weeks of paid family and medical leave to care for a new child or a seriously ill family member, and up to 12 weeks of medical leave to recover from a serious illness or injury of their own.