YES! His best friend is a thesaurus, right? The "Block them" link looks very enticing right now. Also, this could easily be a form letter. He doesn't mention anything that could be specific to you.

$615 million? How the fuck do you spend that much money building a glorified house for yourself if you are not a dictator?

Does anyone have screengrabs of some of these? I live for douchy bro dating app screengrabs.

NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I love hard... with my fists...

Can we put a line through "Love,"? Because I don't have any love for peds.

BOOM!

You had me at garlic.

My late neighbor worked for some food-related governmental agency, and he always said that sprouts are the most likely food to be contaminated. He never ate sprouts. Why do I love them??

DUIs do not a loser make... It happens!

Disgusting penis? Pretty harsh...

All hail the D!

Amen!

Ped alert!!

I woke up this morning and thought, "Salsiccia!"

!!!!!!!!!! MAY THE LIGHT ILLUMINE YOU!

Where's my Wheel of Time merch at??

She has a NAME and it is Porsha uuuukay?

NOT THE GAY SITES!!!

Gah I hate those! We get it, you have a big truck.