This is honestly the most profound evidence that God doesn't exist. Or at least any kind of benevolent one. 

Banning the use of slo-mo (including frame-by-frame) would probably cure most of the problems with replay. Looking at you, NFL.

I sell large portions of my life to capitalists in exchange for fiat currency.

lol

My car cannot be better than my clients

OH GREAT, another berth. Just what the Rivers household needs!

It’s a prototype ejector/smusher seat. Q was stroppy because 007 shagged his daughter...

Tap a Pinto? Explosion.

“Ponder this...what great marriages have is sexual variety! Period! It’s not the equal burden-sharing at home trend, it’s not the fidelity trend. Find someone that is going to let me have unprotected, random sex! Period! #monogamysucks!”

“My fiancée has informed me that sheez letting me go. #thankstwitter!”

A congenital cyst of the brain sounds serious, I’m amazed he could coach successfully as long as he did. Although Jim Harbaugh is going strong, too, and he’s had an inflamed asshole for years now.

Its about making sure a critical mass of EVs that the charging infrastructure gets built out and manufacturers begin to see economies of scale allowing for cheaper EVs to be built. And it is working quite well.

#FakeNews #MAGA #AlternativeFacts #TradeWarsAreEasy

Get out of here with your reasoned and logical responses we want knee jerk responses and electrolytes

Your way off course. The obvious action to take to increase car sales is another tax cut for corporate America. Once that trickles down to the folks making minimum wage, GM won’t be able to build cars fast enough!

I have a friend in a European country. He’s looking at doing a tour of the U.S. As part of his research, he stumbled upon the term “Roll Tide.” He went to Urban Dictionary for the definition:

They didn’t have a battery back-up?

You shut your damn mouth. Nothing is cooler than Swagger Wagons!

Opening it with your thumb with the mouth away from you feels like the technique of someone who has either been handed a shaken up can too many times or has shaken up the can every time before giving it to someone else and knows payback is coming.

There needs to be an “Epic Husband Meltdown Stories” column after that.