I've honestly lost count. Every time I think it is a certain number I remember some obscure encounter.

I'm stunned someone spent seven weeks with this assbutt. This level of assbuttery is irrepressible, so it must have irrupted earlier. In any case, congratulations to the woman in question for this boil popping by itself.

Yeah, fight misogyny by insulting poor people! Oh, no, wait...

Why does the world hate me? Fuck. I was totally into this.

This is what happens when you've had too little sleep and you wrote the story up on Wednesday but it was published on Friday. Fixed.

I'm not big on throwing shade at others pastimes, and I understand it's fully legal, I just don't understand how anyone can look at something that majestic in nature and be like, "I should kill that fucker"

I don't know how anybody could think the F-35 is ugly.

I actually enjoyed this movie.

EEEE. What. A. Surprise.

You can't bat much of anything around Mr. Bumgarner

Whether it's being batted around or not, it's clearly already a fact.

If we can bat the "dynasty" word around the Spurs even though they never won two in a row, I think we can start batting it around a Giants team that has won 3 in 5 years?

I'm a Royals fan. I'm bummed they lost, but this was an amazing post season. Actually, I'm not that upset they lost, since watching them get this far was more than I'd ever expected.

This can't be true, surely?! I was lead to believe that aspartame and vaccines created cancer and no such disease existed until Big Pharma made it up to create revenue for their lizard overlords! Well. It at least confirms that cannabis cures all cancer immediately and is also a wonder drug that will re-grow legs,…

Buzz's MURICA FUCK YEAH boner is now ready for Ejaculuation.

Hopefully, in the near future we won't need any oil or natural gas : http://foxtrotalpha.jalopnik.com/gasp-lockheed-…

Word. Kids are nasty little creatures. Babies sit around in their pee half the day (at least!). Think about that.

Your kid will never know and is, surely, filthier than your pee, anyway.

Good thing no one asked you.