jjandthesimons
jsimon
jjandthesimons

A-fucking-men

The most hilarious part about all of this is that guys like Tucker that drone on and on about how it’s the end of “real men” is that they are the absolute embodiment of betas. Just look at them and listen to them! How alpha is it to sit around all day behind a microphone or in front of tv camera in a damn bow tie

Okay, testosterone levels have crashed and nobody says anything about it, that’s crazy”

What, and I cannot stress this enough: the fuck are they talking about?

oh don’t worry when in the deep south you don’t have to wear the full sheet to show your membership in the KKK you just need your sheriff’s badge

Exercise and stretching work?!  Who knew?

J.K. Simmons.  Sissy Spacek.  Sci-fi.  I don’t even need to know anything else about this.  I’ll be watching the minute it goes live.

YES.

I usually ask my spouse “do you want me to listen or do you want my advice?” Normally that keeps me out of trouble and starts the conversation on the right foot.

If you’re on poorly suited tires, driving too fast, and too close to other vehicles or obstacles then yes... it doesn’t matter much what you do. I’ll give it to you though, if you’re driving on a significant grade.

For the advanced driver, engine brake while normal braking!

Longer than I care to admit! 

If you spell out Betty on a telephone it adds up to 30, and White is 28, which equals 58. The fifth letter of the alphabet is E and the eighth one is H. Reverse that and you’ve got the initials for Herb Edelman, who played Stan on the Golden Girls. Edelman appeared on 17 episodes of St. Elsewhere.

Thank you! I just found an old, old friend.

or really “I”

Tell me you’re from California without telling me you’re from California.

Owen you must be a west coaster. Out east there is is no “The” before I-95.

94 moderate-to-heavy drinkers who gave up alcohol for a month saw a number of improvements in certain health markers, including their blood pressure, insulin resistance, and liver functioning. Giving up alcohol for a month can also help you sleep better and prevent the over-eating that usually happens when you’ve had

Shut down the comments, we’ve got a winner

“Yooo, they got this crazy sale going on. For the low price of $0.00, you can mind your own fucking business.”

If your barista doesn’t specifically say “Christmas” when handing you a latte, that’s Sharia law