The Bears are destined for mediocrity until Cutler is gone. Which tickles me. Fuck that windy, barren, shithole of a stadium and every mouth breathing, unoriginal Ditka costumed, da bears yelling, neck beard fan in it.

When the guy mentioned being upset because he couldn’t smoke a Newport at the game, I thought I was somehow reading the WYTS: Cleveland.

-1 for not including a huge cock reference.

That’s because nobody cares about those pussy sports.

Baaahahahaha I hadn’t noticed that!

And yet, despite all of that, UAB is still a shitty school.

As someone who lives in the land of obnoxious Hawkeye fans, it tickles me you used Jake Christiensen for this image.

Jack McDowell

Where in the hell did you get the finger involved in toothpaste guys story?? He explicitly said he squeezes it directly into his mouth and uses his tongue to spread it. Up your fucking response game, Magary.

Good call, my mistake. And agreed that Rivera was definitely an anomaly. God I hate myself. Such a douche.

Is it a douchey response to remind you that Mo was John Rockers set up man? I know it’s pedantic but he had a pretty nice career.

You could replace CP3 with Kobe in that last paragraph, make it present instead of future tense, and not miss a beat.

That first passage was brutal to keep up with.

I’m sure I’m not the only one who was annoyed that you didn’t just type “Boston.”

I hope this stays around another year, I’ve already signed up for a fall marathon and would honestly like to do this.

Damn. That is cold.

Jake Reed

Leroy Hoard

Merton Hanks

You sound like a terrible boss. Interrogating someone because they were out on a sick day? Yikes.