I don’t know what caused it, but I’m pretty sure that a $5M investigation will soon come up with a theory that justifies taking away draft picks from the Patriots.

12. Horrific motorboating accident.

Don’t forget that time The Berserker blew his chance at the WWF title belt back in ‘92.

“LACES OUT!!!”

I would spend my last dollar on this joke.

Also rumored that for a brief period of time after the Salters report, Texans brass were trying to call Smokey Robinson for advice.

Diabetes mode

Given the Pepsi and Skittles, maybe it’s Diabeetus.

“It’s gonna be, like, 2 degrees? Nah, I’m good. I’ll stay here.”

Regardless of what Tampa Bay does, some other team is going to get either a really good defensive coordinator or a really bad head coach.

They should have just killed two birds with one stone on that call. “Hey Lovie... you’re fired, sorry about that. Now, we’d like to quickly do a 20 minute phone screener for our newly opened Head Coaching position.”

Everyone knows the Steeplechase with Electrified Razor wire barriers was taken out of the Olympics after the 1936 German team was made up of a bunch of elderly rabbis.

The exciting version of Steeplechase with Electrified Razor wire barriers, piranha filled pools (with Brazil’s best water), and hurdles made from fricken laser beams.

Just glad Manning will have a chance to go for that elusive tenth “one and done in the playoffs”.

This is a good move. A crushing defeat in their first playoff game will do less damage to Manning’s legacy at the end of his career than to Osweiler at the beginning of his.

LeBron. Plays. Basketball. Why are you disappointed that a guy wants to do his job? He’s not a hero. He’s an entertainer, no more, no less.

You are a self-righteous cunt, a bad punter and an even worse writer.

No no no, the police obviously pulled up, saw Tamir “relaxing” and started blasting.... The narrative provided by this writer is absurd and false.

I love how you leave out major points of the story. The cops thought it was a real gun because people called the police and said a boy is playing with a gun and threatening people. The story is tragic enough, you dont need to leave out information for sympathy. Most people know the cops did not act appropriately.

“Ignorance is bliss when it comes to our heroes sometimes. Learning the truth is a mighty huge letdown.”