I threw a full can of coke at Fred Phelps’ face. My aim is shit so I only knocked his stupid hat off but he knew it was me.

I've been putting on makeup, but it's all been pretty weird makeup. And clothes. And wigs. Now is the time for all the wackadoo things my natural crazy impulses lead to that are typically inappropriate for office or casual dog walking.  Its WTF time and I'm loving it

Banjo/hip hop would have had me dialing the cops in seconds

The standard city rules are: neighbors too loud? Bang on wall/stomp on floor.  A few loud hits is adequate, don't be a psycho. Any decent people will turn the volume down. This works for neighbors you’re friendly too, and there’s no conversation necessary.

Streetfighter!  That movie was terrific, I wonder if it's on streaming somewhere

I feel this one HARD! There is a bench in my kitchen, by the front door, that my very short dog hops on to get her harness and leash. This keeps me from having to bend over awkwardly several times a day. But my guests will walk in the front door, go 5 feet, and sit on the bench. Be redirected to dining or living room,…

“Not nearly charming as it thought it was” is an excellent description of John Cusack in general. I think everyone in Chicago has a story about him being rude (me too, he’s an ass)

Wow, I completely disagree with this review! I loved the movie (CHICAGO!) and the series (shoulda stayed in Chicago, I think it works better). Zoe Kravitz is a legitimately great actor and, yes, WOMEN DO ACT LIKE THAT. Women can be obsessive and snobby about music, shitty, self-absorbed, toxic in relationships. Not…

May I continue to extol the virtues of Chicago, friends? It’s the perfect mix of Midwestern-indiscriminate-friendliness and Urban-don’t-get-up-in-my-business. I know everyone in my building and most of the people on my block, and most of the dog owners in the neighborhood (extra bonus: there are a million dogs in my…

You really seem like the sort of person who expects endless accommodation for yourself, but is unwilling to extend that generosity to others. You're an adult, you know exactly what air travel is like, have particular trauma and needs (entirely fair), yet make no concessions to avoid triggers and discomfort you 100%…

I work with a lunatic of a man (we’re in finance) that has been offering to set me up with a medical card for ages. He has actual major health issues/chronic pain making him a model candidate for medical cannabis, but it really is just paying $500 or so and filling out forms

Even blueberry muffins are pretty bland, sweet without any interest. I add an equal amount of chopped peaches or mango (canned or frozen works fine) to my blueberry muffins, major improvement

Salmon is gross, stay strong!

Here, here! Panettone is dry as hell

Same! I recommend you get the word out amongst your circle so you'll be the first call when someone needs a last minute date to a gala

I too have some David’s Bridal bullshit in my closet, floor length and shiny lavendar satin. Its ugly as hell.  I should take it apart and make superhero capes for my godchildren and pets, they'd love that. Well, the kids would love that

Real People clothes! I also work from home and refer to those as "human clothes" if I have to do anything beyond walking the dog or getting groceries

Madam, I think we may be the same person.  I no longer "go to work" (work from home full time) so I can dress like a rich old dowager or sports ninja at my leisure, but I still have a closet full of business suits I should really donate

Yup

I work from home and this could be my life if my dog would just be reasonable :)