I lost my older sister 11 years ago, christmas. She was 42 years old. We found her in her bedroom. She had a heart attack while getting ready for work. My father was a wreck for a long time. For a few years, I had to check in with him 2-3x a day. Now it’s only once or twice a day. I still miss her every fucking day.

Ok, fine then. I blame ultra-violent video games.

It’s like people complaining about the idealism in Star Trek because it’s ‘unrealistic.’  Just give me an hour a week where I can imagine that humanity sorted its shit and became the good guys, ok? There’s value in aspirational storytelling.

Seriously, this what AV Club comments are now. 

“This isn’t a Whitesnake music video, man.”

Nesmith was the only Monkee who could write songs like the people who they collaborated with for their biggest hits. I’m more of a Turtles/Flo & Eddie guy myself.

The producers were then made to pay for Ms. Portman’s dry cleaning after she sat right down on their face and took a shit.

FBI: “Reports say they monkey around, but they’re too busy singing to put anybody down.”

The Madonna stuff is true though. I heard he had to postpone the Dare to Be Stupid Japan tour because the middle part of his mustache rubbed off from friction. 

“We want you to know that firing you is nothing personal, just that your process was not conducive to the ethos that we demand here at Arby’s.”

“I am honored by your words. I will pray every night that you & your family have health, happiness, & everything God would give me. I also left a bag full of poop in my top left desk drawer. I have a little girl.”

“Sorry Kinja Caffeine Spider, we have to let you go. But we wish you health and evolution because we believe in restorative justice. Security will now escort you out.”

Ha, a show about a dystopian future where the Christian right has taken over. Hilarious. Not at all especially apropos with current events. /s

Thank you - it’s good great musicians (too) can make attributional mistakes, too.

This is outrageous.

How about commemorating all of the hard working real life meth dealers, Albuquerque? How about them?

Future AV Club headline:

I think there is something to be said for the directors who prove themselves getting more bandwidth. Are they really going to tell Ryan Coogler no for things outside of, like, continuity issues when Black Panther was so incredibly successful? The Russo Bros. seemed to have a similar rapport, and I suspect Taika Waititi…

It’s the second shift at the V Club.  Schimkowitz, Hughes, and (the king) Barsanti.

I really have no fucking idea what that is supposed to be since most of the recent entries have had bright, vibrant colors, but there needs to be some sort of unnecessary, unearned snark inserted into something for it to be a proper AV Club article nowadays.