If a hungover Jimmy Fallon calling your joke “lame” is enough to make you contemplate suicide, maybe give it some serious consideration.

Psst, the past tense of “lead” is “led.”

Lucky you put “in the 80s” in there, else I’d have thought you were talking about Eric Clapton. 

I think the lesson the media should take from this is, when Morrissey dies it will still be OK to call him a prick.

Morrissey is a prime ass, but that doesn’t stop him from being absolutely right about this.

Because they are enforcing a rule the original card owner agreed to? 

And, if you present a membership card with a picture that doesn’t look quite like you, they can and will ask for your driver’s license or other photo ID. As a long-time Executive member, it’s about damn time they ended membership “sharing”. Now, if only Kroger would crack down on obvious, blatant shoplifting maybe our…

It’s obviously Michael Cera.

I assumed they watched Nanette so they were under the impression she was not a comedian.  

It makes more sense in context in the linked article.

I didn’t hate it, I just don’t know if you can call something a “comedy” show if the main purpose or intent of the substantive content isn’t to make people laugh. I won’t argue against people whossay she’s a skilled performer, masterfully juggles tension, or that she can be funny when she wants to be—I’m just saying…

“Thank you for coming in Mr. Questlove. We were hoping you would like to direct one of our upcoming live-action remakes.”

Hey Lifehacker, I’m going to show you how to write an article:

Plastic drywall anchors are just freaking fine for any application that you would WANT to hang stuff on drywall. There are dozens, if not hundreds of different solutions to hanging stuff on drywall and a lot of people make it into this huge debate about…

The Scream 6 marketing is out of control.

That was my first thought - a gender-flipped Starsky & Hutch has already been done and it was called Cagney & Lacey.

I was going to propose gender-flipped Kate & Allie, but I think that’s Full House.

And I can’t get any traction on my new gender-flip script:
Jennette & The Body-Positive Woman

Those methods just seem so complicated for something so simple.

What? It was easily one of the best comedies of the last few years. How does something so unfunny like How I Met Your Father get a second season yet this doesn’t? Seriously the laugh track on that show is just so invasive, watch the opening scene of season 2 episode 1 and when Kim Cattrall is doing her bit the laugh…

Haha. So money talks even louder than your “holier than thou” attitude. Hypocricy at its best! She gives a great example to her fanboys.